Not too long ago, a major realization came to me. I was the "Funny Friend". Never in my life, I had I realized this before, espeically in them midst of my "entertaining days". What I realized, though, was that some women (and likely men) cover up their insecurities about their weight with humour. As is human nature, we all want people to like us and to want to be around us. But who wants a fat friend? In order to make people like us, we become "funny".
I had no idea it was happening at the time, but this definitley happened to me in university (and now that I think about, even in high school!) My new, university friends thought I was hilarious. I was constantly making jokes (often times cruel and rude). I would jump around, be silly and loud, and entertain whoever was around me. My new friends killed themselves laughing and so did I. We had a great time! They were always talking about something hilarious I had said or done. It felt great! Sure, the other girls were considered, smart, cool, even "hot", but I had "funny" and that meant so much. I just kept on entertaining, having a riot, making more friends than I'd ever had before. It was a blast! Now don't get me wrong. There are a few of those people, who became my lifelong friends and who have loved me for who I am as long as they have known me. Yes, they enjoyed "funny Kelly", and I still enjoying entertaining people with silly antics from time to time, but if I could, I'd take back all the loudness, the ridiculousness, and the crude jokes. I don't believe that was the real me. As I said, although I never realized it at the time, I truly believe now that I had become the "Funny Friend" in hopes that no one would notice that what I really was, was the "Fat Friend."
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